


sort of a dick, but interesting

by Khismer



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-20
Updated: 2015-05-20
Packaged: 2018-03-31 09:48:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3973513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Khismer/pseuds/Khismer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>wizard101: You may want to consider toning down that arrogance.<br/>always-blame-the-father: okay, but consider this: eat a dick</p>
            </blockquote>





	sort of a dick, but interesting

She’s barely paying attention to the boards when a private message pops up in the middle of the chat. Too busy sorting through treatment plans and medication histories she's brought home with her -- diazepam, chlorpromazine, haloperidol, all in muddled dosages -- to give her focus to the topic that's veered so far off course, when she glances back at the screen, there it is. **  
**

**wizard101:** Are they usually this banal?

It’s timestamped two minutes ago, so she scans through the latest posts she’s missed. **  
**

**always-blame-the-father:** what, spectacularly misinterpreting the scenes or derailing the convo?  
**always-blame-the-father:** it's yes to both, btw

**wizard101:** No surprise there. I’ve seen wittier dialogue written on cereal boxes. Decidedly more useful, too.

**always-blame-the-father:** don’t go down to the guideless playthrough board then  
**always-blame-the-father:** they tend to think anything goes as long as they don’t read an official guide and they’re not very subtle about asking for hints

**wizard101:** Yes, I’ve noticed. Why they bother with such inanity is beyond me. Can you believe there’s all this fuss about the _difficulty_ of it?

Her lips quirk up. ****

**always-blame-the-father:** hate to say so, but they’ve almost got a point

**wizard101:** Now, don’t tell me you buy into that.  
**wizard101:** Why bother with the game if you rely on the guide?

**always-blame-the-father:** it’s not exactly intuitive  
**always-blame-the-father:** it goes against the norm for what it is

**wizard101:** Oh? Isn’t the traditional rule “check everything?”  
**wizard101:** Second only to “take whatever isn‘t nailed down; if it is, take it anyway, and the nails, too.”  
**wizard101:** Familiarity with the genre should be enough to lead you through it.

**always-blame-the-father:** maybe  
**always-blame-the-father:** but examining the piano stool in the first chapter only tells you it’s hinged  
**always-blame-the-father:** you only notice the pencil if you directly look under the stool, and since you’re running on a time limit, it’s not plausible to check under and around every object

**always-blame-the-father:** I never said I used a guide, anyway

She did, at times, though she’ll be damned if she admits that now.

**always-blame-the-father:** I’m saying it relies less on intelligence than on trial and error

It continues in that vein for a while. She thinks that’s it, but then, a few days later, finds herself responding to another private message. **  
**

**always-blame-the-father:** the question is whether the player is supposed to learn something or if the developer is just writing to a really niche audience  
**always-blame-the-father:** an audience that’s acquainted intimately enough with Proust to solve puzzles based directly off his works  
**always-blame-the-father:** so could you say enough of the audience knows what they’re expected to do?

**wizard101:** The situations are hardly complex enough to require that much mental strain, even for someone with no prior knowledge of Proust’s work. It should be simple to figure it out.

**always-blame-the-father:** a _reasonable_ amount, not just you, genius

The subject changes more over time. **  
**

**always-blame-the-father:** I’m serious  
**always-blame-the-father:** the player is supposed to see them as attractive, right? so even though Black is gender neutral, the vast majority of players take part of Black’s actions or dialogue as hints to their gender  
**always-blame-the-father:** so whether they read Black as more masculine or more feminine can determine how trustworthy they seem, esp since Black provides most of the dialogue **  
always-blame-the-father:** so while some describe Black as capable, if arrogant, others will say the same behavior is  
**always-blame-the-father:** bitchy

And so it goes. They start talking less about games and more about life. No specifics, though. Not that she wants to be secretive, exactly, but she asked what he did first and he was dodgy, so. It’s only fair. Kinda fun, too. She’s pretty sure he’s in the same timezone, or nearly, based on his post times, and he does tell her some. Most everything else is guesswork, learned through little conversations like –

**always-blame-the-father:** and he’s just totally dismissive?

**wizard101:** Completely.

**always-blame-the-father:** people you hate but want to impress are the worst  
**always-blame-the-father:** you’re gonna keep at it tho, right

**wizard101:** Such conviction.  
**wizard101:** You don’t think that may be too much faith? I never said what the difference in thinking was.  
**wizard101:** For all you know, he may be correct.

**always-blame-the-father:** nobody can be right with that attitude  
**always-blame-the-father:** anyway, the best revenge is success, right? doesn't matter if he agrees with you, so long as you can show him you’re right

**wizard101:** Believe me, I intend to.

**always-blame-the-father:** good.

And – **  
**

**always-blame-the-father:** sometimes I think my coworkers are the worst part of my job

**wizard101:** Didn’t you say ‘success is the best revenge?’ Prove your competence.

**always-blame-the-father:** I already know I’m better than them tho and I have proved it  
**always-blame-the-father:** they don’t care

**wizard101:** Oh, is that so?  
**wizard101:** You may want to consider toning down that arrogance.

**always-blame-the-father:** okay, but consider this: eat a dick  
**always-blame-the-father:** I’ll scale back mine when you scale back yours

And—

**always-blame-the-father:** damn it wiz, I’m a doctor, not a cryptologist  
**always-blame-the-father:** what even was that link you sent me

**wizard101:** I thought you might be interested in what I mentioned in our previous discussion.  
**wizard101:** It's encrypted with the same manner used in-game.  
**wizard101:** Modified a little, to account for console limitations.

**always-blame-the-father:** are you serious  
**always-blame-the-father:** there was actual content on there

**wizard101:** Of course.

**always-blame-the-father:** yeah okay  
**always-blame-the-father:** I’ll give it another look after work

He’s... interesting. Sort of a dick, but interesting. And it’s nice to be heard, even if it does only pertain to her hobby.

There’s much too much to do to go _out_ in Gotham, of course, so it’s – something to think about besides work. Work _does_ take priority, so the opportunities to chat are sometimes rare, and she does establish the rule that she won’t respond if there’s something that needs her attention, and no responding _at_ work – well, alright, a few times, but only when she was being condescended to by colleagues, and she wouldn’t have paid attention to that anyway – so she’s not particularly bothered when he’ll go a while with no word, either.

Until he disappears.

Weeks, and no activity. It’s no big deal, though she is a little worried – if he _is_ in Gotham, which he sometimes seems to be from minor little indications, disappearing could be pretty _permanent_. It is a little discouraging on harder days, when she’s got no time for any of the _usual_ stress relief methods – like today, when she was present for yet another riot. At least she wasn’t _directly_ involved this time, although she did end up with a nasty shiner when she was trying to bring order in the aftermath.

Apparently, one of her patients broke away from the guards as he was being led back to his cell, and managed to open up a few more cells on his was out. Things escalated quickly from there, and with 15 patients loose, several of them included in Gotham's illustrious "Rogues Gallery," she'd headed straight home, intending to check up on everything quickly and get some sleep.

Except, when she gets home, there's a reply.

On their last discussion he's written, about an hour or two ago, a lengthy reply with an analysis of the scene, and then: **  
**

**wizard101:** Oh, and happy Hanukkah.

Which is an interesting coincidence considering her last patient before the riot took a particular interest in the menorah on her desk, silver and a little worn, and considering that patient happened to be none other than one Edward Nygma, who is also prone to lengthy dialogue and seems to delight in talking as eloquently as possible. Because it _is_ a coincidence. Absolutely, definitely just coincidence. Right.

No.

She'd thought before, maybe, but -- someone near her, sure, someone that she knew, sure, and if it was someone she was acquainted with, what did it matter? So much the better, even. But this? He _did_ seem familiar the more he talked. And if she's being entirely honest -- she had entertained the idea. Little comments about the weather that matched up much too often, references to incidents that could inly happen in Gotham, that same passion for word games and the more mentally challenging parts of the games.

She goes through and checks the timestamps of the posts, and yep, there's absences that coincide with Arkham breaks.

It's not proof, but it's certainly suggestive of the possibility.

**always-blame-the-father:** thank you! do you celebrate it?

**wizard101:** I don't. It was a lucky guess.

On a spiteful whim, she types: **  
**

**always-blame-the-father:** one of the people I work with left today

**wizard101:** Someone you've mentioned before?

**always-blame-the-father:** couple times. someone that makes life harder.

Absurdly, she feels a little guilty. No, not guilty -- petty. But if the comment bothers him, then he _is_ the person responsible for her new black eye, and for a hundred other grievances before, and he deserves that. If it just seems like a sudden statement, well, he's not who she's thinking of.

**wizard101:** Oh? Sounds unexpected. Did they quit?

**always-blame-the-father:** no, and it's not permanent. just a sudden leave of absence. **  
**

**wizard101:** You must be relieved at the break.

**always-blame-the-father:** I think I am.

And -- and if her conversational partner for a few months has actually been _the Riddler_ (alright, so skipping over the name only makes it worse) then all throughout that unguarded, easy conversation today, he was thinking about his imminent escape. She can't just ask "so hey, what's your stance on puzzles? You wouldn't happen to, say, have a complete hard-on for telling puzzles and riddles to everyone around you to extreme lengths, would you?" or "so what's it like terrorizing entire cities only to be beat up by a man in a bat costume?" She _could_. She shouldn't.  
So, she... sets out to make sure. With the jibes he makes, she's sure he knows, or suspects, who she is and -- _if_ he is who she thinks -- must see her attempts at figuring him out clumsy.  
Though... he's not particularly subtle, either.

( **always-blame-the-father:** take a break and sleep on it. I'm sure it'll come to you  
**always-blame-the-father:** trust me, I'm a doctor

**wizard101:** And you're the type that's knowledgeable enough about the body, then?

**always-blame-the-father:** well, I'm the kind that knows you won't get much done on four hours of sleep)

Thus commences a childish battle for absolute, undeniable _proof._

At one point, in the midst of this, he cuts off contact again. As she guess, she walks into work the next morning to find an amendment to her schedule, a session with the newly recaptured Edward Nygma.

He tells her that his childhood is still the focal part of most other sessions, and of course, they fixate on all the _wrong_ parts.

He doesn't say it, but that might be a subtle compliment. How sweet.

"Yeah, well" she says, and pops her gum -- much to her chagrin, they've been on more casual terms since a few sessions back -- "there ain't no _whiz_ kids among 'em. Not like you musta been, anyway."

Dangerous territory, but the extent of his acknowledgement is a wider smirk and a raised eyebrow, and that could mean anything.

Once, after an incident when she was held hostage ( _again_ , but this time by a patient in the lower risk wards who'd been in the middle of an unfortunate episode, so at least it was mixed up a bit):

**wizard101:** Anything... interesting happen?

**always-blame-the-father:** nothing new  
**always-blame-the-father:** it's been a slow day, especially when trying to go home  
**always-blame-the-father:** I just got held up

She doubts they'll ever acknowledge it fully -- no hinting or suggesting -- but eventually she's... okay with it. With knowing it's him. **  
**

**always-blame-the-father:** hey  
**always-blame-the-father:** merry christmas  
**always-blame-the-father:** try not to do too much damage

**wizard101:** Merry Christmas, Doctor.  
**wizard101:** No promises.

(The next session they see each other is after New Year's. He complains, idly, that everyone left in Arkham over the holidays has been dreadfully dull, though truthfully, he's only had to put up with them for three days. After a lull in the conversation that takes up a few minutes, he says, "I'll have you know I only created an account for... ironic purposes." A grin. "Sure you did.")


End file.
